The eyebrows know all
Still standing
Possible leave of absence?
Spider Catching Cup
Mike learned a very important lesson today: do not drink out of the cup next to my bathroom sink.
My house has a slight spider problem. I, unfortunately, am one of those strange people who cannot kill insects, even spiders. So, when I find an insect in my house, I put a glass over it to trap it, and take it outside a few hours later (have to leave it there for awhile to teach the insect a lesson). It got to the point where I was catching one or two spiders every day, and I was going through too many glasses. So, I started using the same one and leaving it on my bathroom counter. I don't have any other glasses in my bathroom- after taking microbiology, the idea of using the same glass over and over grosses me out. I'm sure you can see where this story is leading.... Last night, Mike was brushing his teeth, and I saw him fill my spider-catching glass up with water. I laughed and told him to stop, and explained what it was for. He had a panicked look on his face as he explained he had been using that glass since he got here Wednesday night.
Excited
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A note to all nursing students
Good luck, and I hope my numerous misfortunes at least make you feel a little bit better about yourself!
My cop stories
One of my favorite blogs is by a Texas cop. After reading her site today, I decided to tell you about my wonderful encounters with police officers. I have actually been pulled over for speeding twice in my life. (I know, I'm awful!!)
The first time I was pulled over, I actually was speeding. I didn't know how fast I was going because I was cut off by a slow old guy, and I switched lanes and accelerated to pass him. As luck would have it, this exact moment is when the cop clocked me. I pulled over onto a dark side street, and the cop asked me for my license and registration. Hmm... where did I put my license? I used to just keep my license in my car somewhere, because I never carried a wallet. It was dark out, and I was digging through my car desperately searching for my ID. The cop pulled out his flashlight and was shining it through my window at me. This was not helping, it actually made it harder to see, and it made me nervous. After a few minutes, I finally looked up at the cop and said, "I'm sorry, can I borrow that flashlight for just a minute?" He handed it to me and started laughing. I don't mean that he chuckled at me- he was full out laughing. I'm not really sure what was so funny, but I quickly learned that making a cop laugh is a good thing. I found my license under my seat, he ran it, came back (STILL smiling), and told me the next time he caught me going 12 over, he would write me a huge ticket. Whew!!!
The next time I got pulled over I was not speeding. Seriously. It was Labor Day weekend, and everyone knows that cops are out on all holidays. I was on the highway headed to my parents house, going the speed limit, when I saw a cop behind me. I switched to the other lane to get out of his way, and he switched lanes with me. Isn't it amazing how your heart can go all the way into your throat when this happens? How do flashing lights have this effect on us?! Anyways, he pulled me over and came up to the window. "Do you know how fast you were going ma'm?" I told him I was going exactly 70. He disagreed, saying I was going 85.
HUH?! My brain was telling me "Stay calm Katie, be polite." Unfortunately, my mouth was not listening to my brain. It said, "Are you kidding me?! When is the last time you calibrated your radar gun?!" Oops, bad question! He got defensive and said, "This morning." My mouth again talked without my permission and said, "Oh, well when's the last time you were actually trained on using or calibrating your radar gun?" I think this is the point where his face turned a beautiful shade of purple.
I explained to him that I was not stupid, I knew there were cops out today, and that I had my cruise set to the exact speed limit. Could he have maybe clocked a different car and accidentally pulled me over? He said no. Could he have misread the radar gun? Stupid mouth talking without brain again!!! This was when I was offered a chance to sit in the back of the cop car. He could show me the printout from the gun or something. I told him that didn't sound good (isn't that where they put the criminals?! Ohhh...I get it.) I don't know why I couldn't be nice! I'm normally such a sweet person,
but when I know I did nothing wrong, I guess I kinda lose it a bit. We ended up concluding that my spedometer must be off (by 15mph?!?). I promised to go get it checked out soon, and he didn't even write me a warning. I don't know why he didn't just arrest me. Or tazer me! I can't figure out where my sudden attitude came from. Or why it wouldn't go away when I told it to! I guess he must have honestly believed me- or thought that I was out of my mind and wanted to get as far away from me as he could. I did get my spedometer checked- and it was fine. I never did figure this one out!!A few changes
Left side of the page: I added categories- this way you can view only the topics you are interested in- nursing experiences, cat stories, lessons...
Right side : Guest book- please sign it if you haven't!
Archives- Click on the month and it will bring up most of the entries for that
month. Near the top right of the blog box, you will see "Next
entries"- click on this to see more for the month.
Photo album- same as before
Things about me - a list of 100 things about me
Construction workers
I have some advice for those ladies who are overtaken by the urge to holler at the cute construction workers on the side of the road while you are driving by:
Make sure that the traffic ahead of you is actually MOVING!! Because when you holler something, and then traffic stops, and you are stuck sitting right next to the guy you and your girlfriends just hollered at, it can be slightly embarrassing.
Brain overload
~ Put face wash on my toothbrush instead of toothpaste.
~ Shaved legs with shampoo (it actually worked pretty well)
~ Attempted to unlock the door on the wrong car (at least is was the same color car)- and I know I am not the only one who has made this mistake!!!
~ Started the laundry, came back to throw the clothes in the dryer, and realized that they were still sitting in the laundry basket. The machine ran completely empty. (This just happened today).
~ Spent about five minutes searching for my glasses when they were on my face.
~ Poured the chocolate from my hot chocolate on my instant macaroni (this only happened once!)
~ Tipped the parking lot golf-cart driving guy with a $10 instead of a $1 for a 1-minute lift to the door.
~ Put the cereal box in the fridge
~ More to come (unfortunately), but I have to take an online pharm. test.
Do you guys have any good ones? Please share so I don't feel like I'm the only one going crazy!!
Dead for three days?
My Grandpa is great. But he is at that point where he gets very confused, and because of this, he makes up a lot of memories. Sometimes these memories are pleasant, and other times they are mean, such as when he "remembers" people stealing stuff from him. I visit him every Friday, and each time he has a different injury from the fall he had on my mom's "flight of stairs from the front porch" - a single step down. I witnessed this fall, and my grandpa did trip, but his fall was broken by my mom's shoulder (which she had just had surgery on). The only injury was my mom's shoulder, not any part of my grandpa. Anyways, every week there is a new ailment from this fall. This week, my grandpa was telling me about his broken back. He broke it, of course, when he did the triple front flip off my mom's flight of stairs. When he landed, he hit his back so hard that he died. When the ambulance got him to the hospital (what ambulance?!), they gave him a new set of veins through his entire body (never heard of this procedure!), and after three days, he rose from the dead (sound familiar?). But, because he was dead for so long laying on his back, the doctor could not tell that he had broken his back. Therefore, it is still broken, all this time later. Oh, I forgot to mention, that his eyeball also popped out, and so now his eyes are puffy in the mornings.
Oh, wow. What do I say to this? I just listen and nod my head and give him sympathy. Thankfully, when he accuses people, such as my mom, of stealing his stuff, he usually mentions the time he died, or his new veins, or his amputated leg (they are both there), or whatever he has come up with that day, and people know he is a little confused.
Side note: I love my Grandpa. It is very difficult to watch him go through this, both because I feel bad for him, and because he is so incredibly mean to his family. Humor is the only way I can handle the situation. I do not mean to disrespect him, I just have to stand back and see the funny side of him instead of the mean, angry, paranoid person he is becoming. If I don't look at things this way, there is no way I could ever handle visiting him, and then he'd sit in his room all alone looking through his "paperwork" tracking down his money.
Pregnant??!
~ When my patients were obviously past child-bearing age, I would still ask them this question. It's kind of like being carded for alcohol when you are forty. It makes your day. Or at least I am assuming this based on the large smiles on their face after they would giggle and say, "No, I don't think so!"
~ Trisha had a man with a large pot-belly come sit down for a shot. As she was getting the needle ready, my teacher came over and put her hands on the man's stomach. She said, "Trisha, I think this one might be pregnant."
Uh... do we laugh? I was stunned- the man didn't laugh. Oops!! Thankfully, after a few seconds of all us students sitting there with the same expression as this cute little smiley- my teacher introduced us to her husband. LOL... After what we (ok, more like I) put her through every day, she deserved to get us just this once.Thanks MuMo!!
You should all check out her site- she is a wonderful writer, and has many touching stories. (I recommend starting with the links on the left of her page- especially Funny Remembrances and Bumpkins.
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Needles can be fun...
Guest book
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Just say it
1) Danielle's new patient is an alcoholic undergoing withdrawal right now. He is heavily drugged, and pretty much out of it. She came running down the hall looking for a bed pan because her patient had been trying to get out of bed so he could use the restroom. When your patient can't even hold his head up for a minute, you definitely don't want him walking to the bathroom. So I went in to help her with him. We put the bedpan under him, and Danielle said, "Ok, you can use the bedpan now." No response. "Alright, why don't you try to have that bowel movement now?" Nothing. "We have you on your bedpan, do you need to use it?" Blank stare. Now remember, Danielle is the Fecal Queen, so this is probably hurting her feelings! What happened to her mojo? LOL.. Well, I used those handy critical thinking skills they've been cramming down our throats the last few months, and leaned down towards the patient, put my hand on his shoulder, and said, "Poop. Now." Problem solved!
We had the curtain pulled back to give Danielle's patient privacy from his roommate, but when we were trying to get him to use his bedpan, we could hear quiet laughing from the other side of the room. When I was leaving the room, I walked by the roommate and he said, "It sure ain't like that in the real world- cheerleaders while you're pooping!!" Yes people, that's why I am working my butt off in school. To be a poop cheerleader. Thanks for pointing that out, buddy!
2) I kept checking on my patient from last week, and found out that he has not had a bowel movement in three days. He was in a lot of pain because of this, and kept trying to poop. The problem is that he can't get up and go to the restroom, so we need to put a bedpan under him. Well, it takes three people to put him on a bedpan, so it is kind of a big ordeal. Poor guy felt like he had to go every twenty minutes, but it just wasn't happening. I could tell that he was embarrased by this- all these people in & out to put him on the pan, so I told him not to worry about it, that we all understand, and that he should not feel bad if he has to keep on trying. He gave me a disgusted look, and said, "So you want me to crap right now all over the bed?" Uh... let me rephrase that!! I'm glad he let me clarify!!
3) Back to Danielle's detoxing patient. He kept asking her for beer and cigarettes today, but of course, those things are not provided by the nutritionist. Towards the end of the day, he was pretty agitated, and when she brought him a glass fo water, he asked, "Is it beer?" She said no. He responded, "Well f*** you then!" Danielle laughed and said, "You did not just say what I think you said, did you?!" He laughed, she laughed, and he drank his alcohol-free water. Sometimes, you just have to let off some steam I guess!
Things to make your hospital visit more fun if you are fortunate enough to have a nursing student:
~ When they are doing your finger prick for your blood sugar test, scream "OUCH!!!" really loud. When they jump back and look like they are going to cry, laugh and say "just kidding." (happened to Trisha today)
~ When they ask if you know your name (part of the neurological screening), be very calm and serious and say, "George Washington". (Ha ha, very funny punk)
~ If you are a male and the student is helping you pee into the portable urinal, tell her you are done, and then continue peeing once she has moved the urinal away from you. (This one was not fun)
~ When they ask if you have any pain, tell them your (make up a name of a body part that does not exist while holding your stomach) hurts. See if they pretend like they know what you are talking about or not.
~ Scream for help from your bed so the nearest student almost has a heart attack before running into your room to help you.... pull out the extra shelf on your tray table!?
Faking a stroke?!
Saying Goodbye
Rachel's patient, who I will call Claire, has been in and out of the hospital with kidney failure for the last year. Her doctors did not recommend continuing therapy (dialysis) because she was uncurable. Unfortunately, her family was not ready to accept this, and because she was unable to speak for herself and had no living will, the dialysis continued. The family said that this "might be the last time" they put her through it. She was fine this morning (nothing indicating she would die today - but definitely within a few months), and the doctor started her dialysis. As soon as he turned on the machine, Claire decided it was time to let go. I wish it had not ended this way- her family putting her through stuff she probably did not want. I know I am being extremely judgmental, and I apologize for that. I have not been in their shoes, and I cannot even begin to imagine how hard it is to allow your loved one to die. I just hope if I ever have to make that decision, I will be strong and do what my loved one would want me to do. I wish she could have died at home after saying goodbye to her family, instead of while hooked up to a machine trying to keep her going one more painful day.
The lung cancer patient absolutely breaks my heart. She is a beautiful young woman with small children, and she looks completely healthy. Her cancer has spread to her other organs, and she does not have much time to live. I was asked to be a witness as she signed her living will today. (Living wills are wonderful, and I highly recommend everyone reading this make one for themselves. Even if you do want to be kept alive artificially for years & years, sign a living will stating this.) This patient does not want her life prolonged if she does not have a good quality of life. No respirator, feeding tube, resuscitation. For some reason, by signing her living will as a witness, I felt like I was signing a death warrant. It is one thing to sign a will "just in case" something bad happens way off in the future- but when you know that this will be relevent within a few months?! It really broke my heart. I would be doing exactly what she is- I wouldn't want those things either. But I would not have been as calm and collected as she was. I'm sure she's had time to come to terms with everything, but today still had to be an unbelievably hard day.
The shot
Magical powers?
Attack of the birds
The cats stayed inside for a few days, but they are back to wanting out whenever I will let them. Yesterday, I was sitting outside with Isis, when all of the sudden she got low to the ground and ran towards the door. Thankfully, the outside door was closed, so we didn't have to deal with another ripped screen. What scared her so much? Bub the squirrel wasn't yelling at her, and I didn't see any birds... I looked again and saw that the leaves were blowing in the wind. Wow. She has really developed a phobia if she is now scared of leaves!! I don't see how anyone could hate cats. They just make life so interesting!
Poor Skitzo
So poor Skitzo was left alone and depressed.
Much better day
Today was a much better day. I got a 90% on my pharmacology quiz, and my prayers were answered about my patient- she is a wonderful person! I went in to say hi to her after class, and she was full of energy and excited to be working with me tomorrow. She is only on a few medications, which means a whole lot less work for me tonight!!
Also, I checked on my patient from last week. He is doing a lot better. It was easier to understand him (maybe I'm just better at understanding him- but hopefully it's because he is improving), he seemed in good spirits, and he said he was working hard with the physical therapist! I really hope I run into him sometime in the future and he is of a healthy weight, walking on his own, and happy about life.
Have I mentioned how wonderful my boyfriend is? If some of you think I complain too much on my site, you should hear what he has to deal with! Last Monday, the message I left on his voicemail went something like: "*Sob, sobb, sobbb, snort*, Hey, *snort*, Mike. I really need *sobb sobb sobbb* a pep *sobb* talk." LOL.. poor guy! He actually did call me back as soon as he could. I probably would have pretended like I never got that message if I were him. He works designing recording studios and home theaters all day (poor thing, sounds awful, huh?!) But he is studying for his architecture licensing exam (at least he should be), so he understands the stress I am constantly under. It's great to have so many supportive people in my life!
Comment
"why DO you want to be a nurse?? are there really no jobs for a Psych major?
is it a form of self punishment? If you are consciously grossed out doesn't that 'vibe' get picked up by the patient?
I know more nursing students that are sqeamish about the human body and yet continue to persue an education that makes them suffer and cry--yet they go back for more- some because they want to be seen as 'good', caring, women. Doesn't psychiatry call this masochism?"
This made me realize that I must not be doing a good enough job of letting you guys know that I do love what I am doing, it just gets hard at times. I use this site to release my stress about my days because it is a whole lot cheaper than seeing a therapist! (MuMo, I believe you call this "Blexcrementing") Sometimes I start an entry out extremely angry, and by the time I am halfway through, I start seeing the good in what happened, and I have to delete the whole thing and start over with a better attitude. I'll admit, there are days I really want to quit. But there are other days, such as the day my patient pushed himself farther than he knew possible, that I can't imagine doing anything else. And on those days when I want to cry or leave for good, I look at my patients, and how the other nurses come into the room, do exactly what they are supposed to do, and then leave. A good example is my patient from last week. The nurses didn't talk to him, encourage him, or take the time to see the good in him. But I did. Because I care. Yes I do get grossed out by the physical stuff at times, but the mental stuff? The part of nursing I honestly consider the most important? I think I am right there with the best of them, and I won't let anyone convince me otherwise. So I am exactly where I need to be, not because I am a masochist, but because my patients now, and in the future, need me.
Katie World cast & crew
Since I talk about my classmates & friends so much, I thought I'd introduce them to you:
The cast:
Janet ~ The motherly figure of the group. Always smiling, even when she is upset and near tears. Once raised her hand in class to annouce that after listening to her child's music, she was surprised to hear that some people actually appreciate her "junk in the trunk".
Autumn ~ The most compassionate human being I have ever met. I stood there in awe watching her comfort a psychotic man who was in restraints. She acted like she was comforting a crying baby, not a grown man in diapers who could possibly hurt her if he wanted to. I hope to learn a lot from her.
Josh~ The one guy in the group. Always keeps his cool when I come running to him, begging him to come help me clean all the poop off my patient. He doesn't even seem annoyed by it. If I were him, I would run the opposite direction everytime I saw me, but he is always eager to help. I owe him a lot!
Danielle ~ Without her, I would not be in nursing school right now. She is the one I call whenever I am having one of my breakdowns, and she always calms me down and convinces me not to give up. Studies way too much, but is smarter than all the rest of us because of it. Always eager to help, especially when I have that deer-in-the-headlights look. She knows exactly what to do- and how to deal with me in these situations.
Rachel ~ Such a sweetheart. Without her encouragement & willingness to let me vent, I definitely would have had at least two dozen more breakdowns. We carpool together when we can, and I really enjoy spending time with her. She is also in a long distance relationship, and understands what I am going through.
Trisha ~ The expert of the group. Always seems to know what to do, and gives off the impression she has done everything many times before (even when she hasn't). Having her around helps me become more confident.
Susan ~ The storyteller. She has a great story for us no matter what the situation. Always saying, "That reminds me of the time..."
Dianne ~ Our clinical instructor. Very friendly and encouraging.
The Crew- Not in my clinical group, but have a huge impact on my life:
Natalie ~ My good friend and my lab partner for the first several months of school. Her sense of humor helped me get through a lot of potentially awkward situations, such as the time we had to give each other bed baths after knowing each other for less than a week.
Mike ~ The boyfriend. He lives in Dallas, and I really miss him. Very sexy, great sense of humor, an amazing person. But he doesn't like my cats!! Thankfully, when we first started dating, I told him the cats would always come first. Ha, you thought I was kidding babe!
Jocelyn ~ Amazingly beautiful girl. I have been best friends w/ her since sophmore year of college. We have fun no matter what we are doing, and she is an inspiring person. Her younger brother is in Iraq right now, so she is going through some hard times.
Joo Ok ~ The other best friend, who I have known since high school (should that have been "whom" Joo Ok?). Lives in Chicago and is studying for her masters in English. When she talks about the books she is reading, it sounds like she is speaking a foreign language. I guess they are all way over my head. A wonderful person, and I wish I got to see her more often.
John ~ John is a great guy, and his jokes & sarcasm help me deal with all the crap our school throws at us. He's one of the people I look forward to seeing every week.
Steve ~ Another college friend who now lives in Chicago. A wonderful writer, and one day I'm sure he will have a job working for Leno or Conan. When he starts updating his site again, I will post the link to it. I'm sure you'll love it.
Iggy ~ We met freshman year of college. He is almost 7 feet tall (so he hovers just a few inches above me), and is one of the sweetest guys I have ever met. Unfortunatley, he is from Chile, so I haven't seen him in a few years.
My family ~ Very loving and supportive. My dad was a pediatrician, so he is able to help me with my homework when I need it. My mom is always there for me when I need someone to talk to. My sister, Mary, is also a nursing student, so she completely understands me! Michael is always able to crack me up. Chris made the mistake of going to K-State (Go KU!!), but I still love him. He is the genius of the family, and always willing to "unfreeze" my stupid computer. Pat, the oldest, passed the Bar exam and acted like it was no big deal. Crazy boy! He is now at NYU in their masters of tax law program.
You guys ~ All the people who read my blog & whose blogs I visit. Being able to escape my own life for awhile and see what everyone else is going through really helps me put things into perspective. And the wonderful comments you leave really help cheer me up. Thanks!
Live & learn
The physical therapists worked my patient hard today, so he was cranky and exhausted. The doctor completely discontinued his tube feedings, so my job was to get him to eat as much of his food as I could. Well, once he was cranky from the therapy, he was not cooperative at all, and refused to eat. I finally convinced him to try one bite of the chocolate pudding. He reluctantly took a large spoonfull, and then spit it out, all down the front of his gown. Hmm... you just got pudding all over your face and gown to punish me? You're the one covered in pudding! LOL.. Unfortunately, he was smart and knew that I would have to change his gown, and that doing so takes a lot of effort (this was before our 'body mechanics' class.) Next week, he can spit out all the pudding he wants, because I will know how to change his gown without needing three classmates to help me!
We are still learning how to handle certain situations- such as when a patient asks us to go open the patio door to let his cat in. Well, there is no patio door, and none of us have seen any cats. So do we pretend like we let the cat in?
The Fecal Queen
I have a few cute stories for you:
Yesterday, I helped my friend Rachel clean up her patient who had diarrhea all over himself. He was an adorable elderly man, and he was very confused. He knew we were there and working with him, but I don't think he realized he had made a mess, or what we were doing. This fact became clear when we had him rolled onto his side, and when I asked if he was ok, his response was, "Would you like to hear a science joke?" Uh.. sure? Unfortunately, he did not actually have a science joke for us. Patients can say the most random things at the weirdest moments!
Today, Rachel was in the room with her patient (same one from story above). He was doing completely fine until Danielle walked in. All of the sudden, he started breathing heavy, and Rachel asked, "Are you having trouble breathing?!" He responded, "I am having trouble breathing. But I'm not having trouble pooping!" Rachel lifted up the sheet and once again, there was diarrhea everywhere.
A few hours later, Rachel was working with her patient when Danielle came in to see if she needed help. Pretty soon, the patient had diarrhea. Somehow Danielle must have a laxitive effect on our patients! As a result, Danielle has been forbidden from entering any of our patient's rooms, and earned the nickname The Fecal Queen!
After flushing my patient's feeding tube with water today, I remembered to turn the feeding tube back on (I forgot to do this yesterday, and was made fun of by his mom). I walked around to the other side of my patient to help him feed himself (he has a feeding tube & eats a little on his own). Well, fifteen minutes later, I walk back around the bed, and there is a puddle on the floor. I see the liquid food dripping, but can't figure out where it is coming from. Is there a hole in the tube? Is there a problem with the connection between the food jar and the tube? Nope. Then it hits me, I had hung the connection part of the tube up at the top of the IV pole and although I turned the machine back on, I did not remember to connect the tube to my patient. The food was dripping all the way down all over everything. Oops! I quickly fixed my mistake and cleaned up the mess. My patient was laughing at me. At least I brightened his day, right?
When a patient is considered a "fall risk", there is a red sign put on their door, and everyone who walks by is required to peek in and make sure the patient is not trying to get out of bed. I peeked into a fall risk patient's room today, and saw the guy at the end of his bed trying to stand up. I ran over to him and said, "What are you doing?!" He replied, "I was just about to lay myself down." Sure you were. Reminds me of a little kid whose face is covered with chocolate, saying "I don't know what happened to all the candy!" I stayed and talked with the man for a few minutes, and he was a really friendly guy. When I told him my name was Katie, he said that my name scared him. Never heard that before! So I asked him why, and he replied, "From that awful Hurricaine Katie!!" Geez! I should have known.... LOL
Flapping in the wind
This is an image I will never forget~ While eating lunch in the cafeteria, I looked out the window and saw a middle aged man smoking a cigarette. Well, this man happened to be a patient. Wearing nothing but his hospital gown (yes, they still make them where they don't close in the back). Still attached to his IV pole. Smoking a cigarette!? That is what I call dedication.
And just in case you were wondering, my patient stood up with Physical Therapy five times today!!! Yeah!!!! It normally takes three therapists to get him up, but today, it only took two. He's getting stronger! I am really proud of him.
When I went in to his room this morning and he was sleeping, I watched as he would grab his paralyzed arm with his good arm, shake his paralyzed arm, and whimper. This was heartbreaking to see, especially for his mom. I really hope he keeps his determination and gets better!
Complete mental breakdown- details
Yesterday was an interesting day. To make a very long story short, I only got four hours of sleep the night before (big test), I got a migraine, and I had to go to school from 8-5:15, then drive across town to the hospital my clinicals would be at (we had to get the information on our patient for the next day). Doesn't sound like a big deal, and it shouldn't have been, but the drive in traffic took almost an hour and a half. So we got to the hospital around 6:45, and had to look up all the information on our very first acute care patient. Although the nursing home was a lot of work, it can't compare to the stress of acute care. So, I have been worried about my first patient, but I was sure my teacher would give us all easy patients to start with. Any humane teacher would do that, right? Wrong. I walk into the hospital smiling and excited. I walk up to the board and find my patient’s name. I look at his chart and on the cover there is a bright sticker that says "Isolation precautions" (This means the patient is sick with something very contagious). I don't know where they came from, but right there in the nurse’s station in the hospital, tears started running down my face. Crap, I can't cry before clinicals have even started!! There are nurses everywhere, this is so embarrassing. Thankfully, my friends (also nursing students) took me to a different room and we looked through the chart, hoping it wasn't going to be as bad as it looked. I look at the first page, and it says 450 pound male stroke patient, unable to communicate, C-difficile infection (causes awful diarrhea), right side paralyzed, feeding tube in place, diabetic. Patient's mother stays with patient 24hr/day. This is about the point where I started hyperventilating. 450 pounds!!!?!?? His mom will be there scrutinizing my every move? Diarrhea? Feeding tube? "Breathe Katie. Don't forget to breathe." AAHHHHHHH!!!!! I did my best imitation of the nursing home "NURE!!" lady. I have nothing against people with any of the conditions my patient has. The problem was that I was running on little sleep, I was extremely overwhelmed, I had a migraine, I was expecting a patient with one easy-to-treat problem, I was frustrated, and I am nervous enough having my teacher watch my every move- but a patient's mom who is probably just waiting to jump on every mistake!?!? I pulled myself together, left without any weird looks, and broke down in the parking lot. We got out of there around 8, and I still had four hours worth of stuff to prepare- look up all his drugs, conditions, make a spreadsheet..... Clinicals start at 6:30 am. I made it home, walked in the door & collapsed again crying. Why do I think I want to be a nurse? Sometimes I completely forget. I don't want to clean up diarrhea!! I don't want to try to move a 450 pound patient when my back is already aching. Anything but this!! Have I wasted all this time and money in school for the wrong thing? As I said yesterday, I had a complete mental breakdown. Thankfully, my dad is a doctor, and he was willing to sit down with me and go over the charts, figure out my patient's diagnosis, look up the meds, and do all the other preparatory work. We finished around 11:30. Had he not helped me, I would have been done closer to 2am. My school is on my crap list. I wasn't in this predicament because of poor planning on my part, but because some idiot administrators at my school decided it would be fun to see which student snaps first. Well, congratulations to whoever had dibs on me!
Now, moving on to today. The RN who was assigned to my patient was not friendly at all, and was annoyed to have a student nurse working with her. He had a lot of trouble talking from his stroke, but I tried really hard to understand everything he said. At one point, he tried to get himself out of bed (no way- he fell a few days ago, and I was not letting that happen on my watch), and when I stopped him, he said “I’ll never be able to walk again.” Uhh… what do I say? I can’t give him false reassurance, he might be right. But I can’t just pretend like I didn’t hear that comment…. So, I said “There is no way to know right now if you will be able to walk again. But I do know that the harder you work at it now, the better your chances will be. Physical therapy is coming later today, give it everything you can.” He reluctantly said, “Ok.” I could tell he was thinking “shut up and get out of my way.” But he was nice about it. Later, when PT came to work with him, they stood him up three times. Just the act of sitting up is extremely difficult for him, so standing up is a really big deal. After the third and final stand, they were about to take his shoes off and he started mumbling something. They stopped to listen, and he was saying “Again.” I almost started crying right then. They stood him up for the fourth time, and it was obviously really painful and hard for him. But he did it. I have not even known the guy 24 hours, and yet I was so proud of him that I wanted to scream. I kept bringing up his achievement the rest of the day, and filled his mom in on it several times (she was out of the room at the time), and even though she already knew the story, watching his face as I told it was rewarding. I can’t wait to see how hard he pushes himself tomorrow. It’s amazing how one person doing something as simple as standing up changed my whole outlook on the day. Would he have gone for that fourth stand if I hadn’t had that talk with him? Maybe. What if I had left the room and he had no one to prove anything to? Maybe. But maybe not. Could I have given him that little bit of inspiration that he needed? I hope so. Because the little things like this make me remember why I wanted to be a nurse.
If the physical therapy incident wasn’t enough to change my outlook, a comment my patient’s mother made would have done the trick. As I mentioned before, she is at the hospital almost twenty four hours a day. It is obvious that she does not trust the nursing staff to take good enough care of her son (I can’t say I blame her). Well, when my teacher was in the room (perfect timing), the mom was looking at her calendar and asked me, “Will you be here on Friday working with my son?” We don’t have clinicals on Friday, so I told her no. She said, “Dang, because there is a meeting I wanted to go to on Friday, and I’m comfortable with you here. But without you here, I’m not going to go.” Can you believe that? This evil woman waiting to eat me alive at my first little mistake gave me a wonderful compliment right in front of my teacher? A few minutes after she said this, my teacher said, “Katie, I have a question for you, let’s go out in the hall.” Oh, way to burst my bubble!! What did I do?! We get out in the hall and she smiled real big and said, “Did you hear that!?!? Can you believe she will trust you to take care of her son but not the licensed nurses here?” Wow, my day really turned around!! And I just want to mention, his mother was wonderful (besides just making this comment). At one point, I forgot to do something really important, and she brought it up while making fun of me, which I thought was a perfect way of handling the situation. Like always, I learned a lot today. Not much about medicine or taking care of people, but about the importance of human bonds. They are strong enough to make a woman live in a hospital for 21 days to take care of her son. To make a stroke patient push himself harder than he thought possible. To make a crazy nursing student realize, yet again, that it’s not at all about me and my feelings, but about my patients and their feelings.
How NOT to potty train your child
When potty training my brother, my mom always emphasized how big boys keep their pants dry. She even went as far as to iron a picture of his favorite cartoon character onto his underwear, so if he wet himself, he would make Winnie very unhappy. Well, Michael must have been a good listener:
1. My mom went into the kitchen and saw Michael's pants on the floor. Next to his pants, a puddle of urine. Could she get mad at him? Nope. He definitely kept his pants dry!!
2. When she set up a pool in the backyard, she watched as he took off his bathing suit before getting in the water. He knew better than to get his pants wet!! Smart kid, huh?
My encounter with Super Man
Stop and think
Studying
The incredible, throwable egg!
I found the solution to all my daily frustrations: eggs.
~When the stupid drivers on 71N drive in the mile-long exit lane and then cut in front of all the bumper-to-bumper traffic at the last second although they knew the entire mile that they were in an exit lane- I'll throw eggs at them!! Oh, that would make me feel so much better.
~When my fellow classmates ask the most random, irrelevent questions, prolonging class by half an hour, I'll throw eggs at them too!!! Some of these people are wonderful human beings, but they can't handle the fact that we are just learning the basics right now. They want to know what to do in every single situation.
~When my teachers say, "Now this won't be on the test, but I want to tell you this fifteen minute story about the time...." BAM!!!! Hit on the head with an egg.
~ When I open the letter from my insurance company informing me that my insurance will be going up $20 per month again. BAM!! Hit the person closest to me with an egg or two. No, it's not their fault. But for some awful reason it would still make me feel a little bit better.
~ When my cat thinks she is being cute by attacking the pen as I am writing. Awww.. I couldn't actually hit her with an egg. But I could throw it across the room and hopefully she would chase it and forget what she was doing.
~ Eggs would also be good for some old-fashioned classical conditioning. Whenever the snobby girl in our class gets that "I'm better than you" look on her face, BAM!!! It would probably take a few dozen eggs, but maybe she'd get over herself.
~ To the administrators at my school who thought, "We have the teachers and resources for thirty nursing students. But we would make a lot more money if we had sixty nursing students. So why don't we just have 75 students and call it even?" BAM!! BAM!! BAM!!!!! (That was them getting hit with three eggs, in case you haven't caught on).
~ For the person who takes up two parking spaces just so no one door dings them. Hmmm.... which is worse, door dings or a half dozen eggs?! Yea, maybe you shouldn't have taken that close spot, huh?
~ To the people at textbook companies who decide to change one or two words in a book just so they can put out a new edition, making poor college students waste hundreds of dollars on something they will get very little for when they sell back, because another word or two will have been changed by that point.
~ To make omelettes with for the cops who come to arrest me for property damage, assault, and battery for all my fun with eggs. Maybe they would let me go?
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